Something for Nothing

My first post in 2012!

2012-01-06T00:52:00.001+08:00

Kinda miss my blog lately. Was busy with clinical attachments and assignments. Life as a nurse really sucks to the maximum of suckness. But hey, we 'the nurses' manage to get through it. We sacrifice xmas, new year, etc to take care of ur love ones while u're having dinner, fun, reunion with family, what about our family? When u yelled at us for small tiny matter due to the hectic situation in the ward, we apologize, we know you are concerned about your love ones, but hey, do u know we do have love ones who are sick at home or in other hospital but yet, we put yours in our priority. You guys manage to bid last farewell to your love ones before they pass away. What about us? We can only attend their funeral and pay our last respect there. Cmon people, why are you still looking down on nurses? Even doctors can go home to sleep, anything happened, we will settle for them or just ring them up, they give instructions, continue to sleep. Why are you always say thank you to the doctors but not to the nurses? Who spend most of the time with u, talk to u, bed sponge u, clean ur 'shit', make sure u eat while we suffer from gastritis, make sure u pass urine while we have overload bladder? This world is sick, really sick.... We are Humans, we do have feelings...Sigh

It's the end of the year again! Blessed Christmas and A Happy New Year!

2011-12-24T21:50:00.002+08:00

'In a Blink of an eye', year 2011 coming to an end. As usual, many ups and downs throughout the year. Most important thing, I enjoyed the process and learnt alot and grow in it. Got a new life, a better half of me (wink~~), career advancement, more love, much exciting journey with faithful friends, etc. All praise to be God. Looking back at what happened to me past 26 years, it's like a flash of light, now I am a grown up with own career, more responsibilities, aw...How I wish to be a child again. Haha. Silly me. Anyway, don't want to crap much because it's Christmas day tomorrow. Got to wake up early in the morning to go to church yo! Merry Christmas and A Happy New Year to y'all. Have a blast and a great year ahead! Take care.

Xmas is just around the corner....

2011-12-18T21:45:00.001+08:00

This year, 2011, I have decided to do something different on christmas day. As normal, we will celebrate this day with love ones, go to church, have christmas dinner etc. This year, I am going to join uncle sam and WH family to do some charity work and celebrate christmas with someone special.

When I watched Glee season 3, I came across with this song and it touches my heart deeply, wanna share with u guys out there.

EnJoy! Blessed Christmas to all of ya!

Emo'ing' and got saved!

2011-12-06T02:05:00.001+08:00

After posted the new entry 'patience', i got emo again. Was thinking about the issue. Having insomnia now. Was listening to all sorts of sad musics. As i type in youtube search engine to search for more emo songs, these two songs came to me. Without any hesitation, i clicked on the video and i got touched by the lyrics, as though God is speaking to me. Here, i want to share with you guys about these two vids.

David Hodges ft Amy Lee - Breathe

This is the air I breathe
This is the air I breathe
Your holy presence living in me
This is my daily bread
This is my daily bread
Your very word spoken to me

And I, I'm desperate for you
And I, I'm lost without you

This is the air I breathe
This is the air I breathe
Your holy presence living in me
This is my daily bread
This is my daily bread
Your very word spoken to me

And I, I'm desperate for you I'm desperate for you
And I, I'm lost without you I'm lost without you
And I, I'm desperate for you I'm desperate for you
And I, I'm lost without you I'm lost without you
I'm lost without you
I'm lost without you I'm lost without you

This is the air I breathe
This is the air I breathe
Your holy presence living in me

And I, I'm desperate for you I'm desperate for you
And I, I'm lost without you I'm lost without you
And I, I'm desperate for you I'm desperate for you
And I, I'm lost without you I'm lost without you
I'm lost without you I'm lost without you
I'm lost without you

"For I am convinced that neither death nor life, nor angels nor principalities nor things present nor things to come, nor powers, nor height nor depth, nor any other created thing, will be able to separate us from the love of God which is in Christ Jesus our Lord."

David Hodges feat.Amy Lee - Fall Into You

Seems so far that I have gone down this road
Only to find that it ends
But looking back, there is one thing that I know
I can't make it all alone again

'Cause I'm too weak
To stand on my own
When all I need is you

So lead me, guide me
Hold me, hide me in love
With all that you are
And all that you do
Hear me, take me
Mould me, break me oh god
Just fill all of me
As I fall into you

Just catch me as I fall
When all this time I have felt so alone
Losing myself in my despair
With loving arms
You were waiting for me to let go
With every step you were there

'Cause I'm too weak
To stand on my own
When all I need is you

So lead me, guide me
Hold me, hide me in love
With all that you are
And all that you do
Hear me, take me
Mould me, break me oh god
Just fill all of me

Oh my child, how I have longed
For you to come home to where you belong
All of your life, if you could just see
All of my joy, when you are here with me

Oh my child, how I have longed
(Lead me, guide me)
For you to come home to where you belong
(Hold me, hide me in love)
All of your life, if you could just see
(With all that you are)
All of my joy, when you are here with me
(And all that you do)
Hear me, take me
Mould me, break me oh god
Just fill all of me
As I fall into you

Beh Tahan...haha

2011-12-05T19:51:00.001+08:00

Do enjoy the video! Haha...I got stomachache after watching these videos, hard to breathe! Haha

Patience

2011-12-05T04:40:00.000+08:00

It's been a month since i enrolled in post basic in critical care in Sime Darby College. My opinion so far? One word to describe it, 'SUCKS'. Most of the time no lecturer in the class, reasons? Having class with the diploma students, clashing of time tables etc. Compensatory mechanism? Assignments and self study most of the time. I do not know when was the last time i have a good sleep during week days. Most of us are sleepy in the class, from 8-5pm then have to rush home to do assignments. The words that came out the most from the lecturer's mouth were 'you all are post basic students, not diploma students, you should have know this and that, learnt this and that, that is your pre-requisite skills bla bla bla'. Have they forgotten there are some year 1 staff nurse in the midst of us? Reading from slides is another mistake, might as well i get the hand out and read it at home. Snug and cozy. These are all my complaints for the first 2 weeks, in my heart, i am really frustrated. Many friends told me to pray and surrender to God, and i did surrender all to God and pray but prayer isnt my specialty, but God did answer my prayer in a very creative way of His. I have to learn to be more patience. That is the only thing i need to build up my faith. I am too 'rushy' sometimes and even people around me cannot bear with me. I want to do things fast, be productive, efficient but i have never thought of the things i have missed during the process. That is enjoyment of doing the particular thing. Enjoy the process and be grateful to people that helped out. Same things goes to christianity, i am rushing myself to be more like Him. Everytime i stepped into the church, i felt isolated and low self esteem. They are so close to God, i dont even know what is going on in the church, follow them to sing, to praise, trying to understand every words from the sermont, the character, the event, etc. Frankly, i got very stressed up. That is why everytime after the service, i quickly and quietly ran off from the church, and i cried in the car. Again, the word patience came into my mind. But how? I am supposed to be happy to be in the house of the Lord, now, i am afraid. I am...

For you my darling...

2011-11-28T01:20:00.001+08:00

Still loving you

2011-11-19T00:31:00.001+08:00

To You,
Sry, It took me sometime to read your blog. I have read your letter and most of your updates. I cried, I wanna hold you in my arms and to tell you that, I am still loving you. Neither of us have done wrong. If time could turn back to that day, I would say sry and hold you tight, would never let you go. You are not the only one pretending, I am too. I pretend not to go out on your bday as well, cx i know i would cry, and i will. I don't have the courage to face you for the time being as I am facing great spiritual dilemma as well. I dont know which path to walk now. I really dont know. Would you wait for me? Can we start all over again? Miss you loads, wk.

From the one still loving you but lost...

A little Faith at a time...to draw closer to GOD.

2011-11-13T23:27:00.001+08:00

13/11/2011 (Sunday)

Alarm struck my head at 0900H, as usual, snoozedit and continue to sleep. I slept at 0400H earlier, felt so tired and helpless in waking up =P. Out of sudden, i felt my body was energized and refreshed, I stood up from my bed, feeling awkward of course. Hmm, nevermind. Headed to shower, and prepare to go to church. Got a Whatsapp message from Mr Eric Hiew, a gentle reminder for me to go to church =.=|||. As i drove to the highway, there were many cars even though in Sunday morning? I wonder why? Reached WH at 1020H, whoa, there were lotsa cars there, most are church-goers i guess. Tried to find a parking there, circling that place for quite some time, didn't manage to get one. My mind already given up, wanted to go home but my limbs arent with me tho. They drove me to a place where there's a parking space there, the disadvantage of this parking venue was, it is vey far from the church and in needed to walk uphill! Sigh... My legs are willing to do that for me and i walked to the church. As i stepped into WH gate, i was SOB, sweating and tachycardia. The moment i stepped into the hall, I felt relatively comfortable and peace. Then the service go on. Felt kinda weird at first, ouch, should i use fresh or new? I find that i am totally a noob or a newbie in christianity. There was a moment of silence during the sharing, what touched me the most was when uncle sam came out to share with us, the moment he shed his tears, i can feel inside myself there was a river of tears circulating my whole body, it came naturally, didnt even go through my brain for translation. Then, there is this song playing in my head, 'There is none like you'. I sung it quietly in my heart, shed a few tears but still pretending macho >.<. I am really glad that I am saved, am walking on the right track now. Uncle Sam brought me back to christ, God uses Uncle Sam to guide me, not only in christianity, about life, studies, etc. I am glad to get to know a bunch of good friends @ bro and sis in Christ. Do you know that they willing to give me a wake up call @ calls just to get me to the church? I am really touched by them. Hugs all =)

The Offical Music Video, Uninspired by Djezna's Stalker DjeznasStalker

2011-11-08T20:13:00.000+08:00

Local Malaysian band. Do support them, support good music!!! Nice work there! Bravo!

Oh NO!!!!!!

2011-11-06T14:07:00.000+08:00

One word ---> Frustrated. Nothing left in my hard disk after the viral fever. After resuscitation, Moi PC left nothing behind T_T.....haihz -_-|||

Argh~~~~~~~ Woof ...Wooof............................@!#%@$%!#^!&%&

I have made the first step...

2011-10-31T07:07:00.000+08:00

After so many years of struggling, arguing, denying, cursing, etc. Finally, I surrender myself unto HIM. Many ups and downs in my life, GOD has been helping me along the way although I did not pray unto him or asked for his help, he has never given up on me, I knew it deep down into my heart but I was scared to admit that HE is real. Maybe I don't deserve to be his child, I am a disgrace to christian being. I don't want to crap much about my past for I am a new being now, a life with more faith, a happy life with someone will never forsaken me, never failed me, a great listener, and all in all, a caring FATHER. No words could comprehend how I feel now. I am just happy, yes I am. I wanted to thank a person, for 3 years GOD sent him to guide me, help me along this Christian road, walk with me side by side. His name is Uncle Sam. Big hugs to him!! Tian, Eric, Rachel, Wern Loong, Amy, thanks guys, or should i say brothers and sisters in Christ. =)

Shalom....

A brand new Will Ku 2011 model, production of JESUS CHRIST TM

Kwong sai food =)

2011-10-24T08:34:00.000+08:00

Well, went to this kwong sai food restaurant in SS15 with Hwa and his family to have our dinner. The food there...hmm...1 word....scrumptious! Reasonable price. Thanks loads! Revisiting? A must! =)

Alpha outing

2011-10-24T08:30:00.000+08:00

22/10/11

Got up early today, was excited about the alpha outing, first time being excited about a christian activity. Took off early to pick up my friend. Stop at a junction near my house, waiting to cross the hectic road. Outta sudden, a motorcycle flew in front of my car, a kiddo was trying to do some stupid stunt but was outta control. I saw the bike flew up high and smashed on the road. OMG and WTF!!! I am so damn lucky that the bike did not hit on me. Phew!! Reached SS17 safely, pick up my friend, turn on my GPS and another WTF!!! Can't locate this place named 'KUANG'. Called for help...in the end, gotta meet up in the ministry house, someone will guide me from there...huhu...Took off to Federal highway....again, another WTF!!!! Traffic jam...argh....hate this..>.< ||| Reached ministry house about 1300H.

We drove from KL to Sg Buloh then to Kundang, then Kuang...Finally, reached MBS!!! What an isolated place...Quite but nice tho....Didn't take much photos there...

The seminar hall

The swimming pool

The indoor stadium where 'Rachel' got her head bum. >.<

Kinda enjoy the activities and facilities there. Thank you to all the organizers and friends. The most important thing, i have been touched. Perhaps, my perception towards Christianity might have changed, not deviating to the negative site, but to be more open to GOD. The barrier between the door of my heart and Christ had started to break off. All in all, i felt peace...real inner peace...

Weight....KGs...Pounds....in EXTRAAAAA

2011-10-18T23:08:00.000+08:00

OVERWEIGHT!!!!! OBESITY!!!!!! HYPERTENSION!!!!!!!

This was me in college time.....+ / - 70kg

Then.............

Current me....+ / - 105kg >.< WTF! -_-|||

Weird right? People normally post a photo of their fattest moment and then the successful weight loss! I am the opposite, T_T Weight gain and gain and gain, from 70 to 105, 35kgs extra. Imagine have to carry this body to walk and run if i could run. >.< Always say wanna diet but ended up with weight gain instead of weight loss, blood pressure shot up, always sprain my ankle, shortness of breath, horrible snoring. ARGH!!!!! Come on Will Ku, drop all the extra kg!!! come on!!!!

My feelings is still tethered to you...

2011-10-17T07:48:00.000+08:00

The photo explains everything.......

The Road Not Taken...best describe my situation now...=(

2011-10-11T17:23:00.000+08:00

Robert Frost (1874–1963). Mountain Interval. 1920.

1. The Road Not Taken


TWO roads diverged in a yellow wood,
And sorry I could not travel both
And be one traveler, long I stood
And looked down one as far as I could
To where it bent in the undergrowth;	5

Then took the other, as just as fair,
And having perhaps the better claim,
Because it was grassy and wanted wear;
Though as for that the passing there
Had worn them really about the same,	10

And both that morning equally lay
In leaves no step had trodden black.
Oh, I kept the first for another day!
Yet knowing how way leads on to way,
I doubted if I should ever come back.	15

I shall be telling this with a sigh
Somewhere ages and ages hence:
Two roads diverged in a wood, and I—
I took the one less traveled by,
And that has made all the difference.	20

LOGOS HOPE visit in west port klang

2011-10-04T16:41:00.000+08:00

The ship LOGOS HOPE

Don't play play...i've donated 10 bucks k? =P\

Bought some readings materials...The most important book, the ALPHA 'Question of life'....

A very sad day

2011-10-04T16:35:00.000+08:00

03/10/2011 (Monday)

Today would be the saddest day of the month. Today, i am going to bid farewell to one of my favorite child in ICU. Early in the morning, i saw this beautiful scene along KESAS highway. Hey, life is beautiful. Usually we are too busy to notice things around us, today, this scene caught my attention. I slow down my car, enjoying the view. Actually, i am just delaying the time to reach to the hospital. Denial stage perhaps. Once i've settled with the parking, i took a deep breath, walk to ICU. As i opened the door, i told myself to control my emotion and i did it well. Helping my colleague Mariyan in preparing the items for transportation, settling the bill etc, making myself as busy as possible. 1000H, times up, it's time to sent the lil one back to Singapore. One by one came to bid farewell to him, caress his head for one last time, one by one broke down, river of tears flowing in ICU. I hold my tears back, packed everything and transferred the child to the stretcher and into the ambulance. While we're in casualty waiting to load things into the ambulance, one of my brother came down to say goodbye to the child, he burst into tears, and again, one by one crying again, and again, i held my tears. For 3 months he has been with us, from a patient to a friend, and now, he is like our lil brother. Took us 3 hours plus to reach Singapore, settled him down in paeds ICU, there...the moment i do not want to face, to bid farewell. I held my tears, kissed on his cheek, caressed his head for one last time, and he said to me...goodbye kor kor will, i replied him 'goodbye' and ran out from the room. I did not cry. Headed back to sunmed about 10pm. Exhausted. Looking at the empty bed in ICU 6, i have already started to miss him. For past 3 months, we stepped into ICU, the first thing we would do is to say 'hi' to him, caress his head, kiss him on the cheek, play with him. Now, it's just part of our memories. Be strong there, chemotherapy is a very tough process, be tough there, no matter where u are, we're always there for you. Hope to see you again...MIKA baby.....T_T

TIRED!!!! EXHAUSTED!!!!

2011-09-27T22:24:00.000+08:00

Another baby died today. As usual, shuffle in ICU again...TIRED..stressed!!! Many shed their tears today....lights flickering just before the baby give up...reaper came to us today....FUCK! Tired to crap alot today...one WHOLE FUCKING DAY!

Chinese Paladin 3

2011-09-26T18:06:00.000+08:00

Review from Will =P

Overall a very nice fairytail. Great graphics and effects on the chinese kung fu and skills casting. Very romantic and touching love stories, not merely love between both sex, it's about family, friends, etc. A big applause to the music as well, came out on the right time at the right scene, enough to draw my tears out. A worth the time masterpiece. ^_^ At least i've spent 3 days to finish the 37 episodes, managed to rewind back to understand more...haha

Kung fu panda

2011-09-24T08:19:00.000+08:00

Familiar with this character? Lol. The 5 years old kiddo in ICU i've mentioned earlier said to me, 'kung fu panda'. I asked him, will kor kor is the panda or you? he said 'YOU'!!! >.<

Retards driving!

2011-09-23T08:23:00.000+08:00

Damn fucking retard lady driving in front of me today. She kept looking left and right as though there is something bothering her, driving speed at 10km/h. Dang. Jam some more. My temperature raised up slowly until one extend, i have used my 'horn'. I don't usually use that thing because i don't like the sound. I'm getting pissed with most of the drivers nowadays, i don't know how they got their license and as though they owned the road. Fucking retard!

Love you M**A..

2011-09-22T09:17:00.000+08:00

This is the 5 year old boy with his toys and TV in ICU.

Nurses life

2011-09-22T09:02:00.000+08:00

You must be thinking 'what la will, all ur blog post about ur work, ur pt only, no life ah?'. The answer is yes, nurses life really sucks big big time. Work, work, tired, sleep, wake up, go to work again then rest day OT. Time to enjoy ourselves is so limited. When we're free, our friends all busy working. When our friends are free, we're busy working. Sometimes, i can hardly see my family for few days even though we're staying under one roof. Sigh. I'm getting sick of this. We work so hard, poured our TLC to our beloved pt, holistic care, from ADLs, psychological, financial, safety, social welfare, till then end of life care. You tell me, apart from GOD, who will take good care of you when you're sick without complaining? All the nasty dirty work, we did it perfectly. I don't think your family members or the doctors would clean your ass for you. Malaysians are treating the nurses very badly, especially those filthy rich bastards, treating us like a maid. They don't understand the concept of nursing. We are not your servant, we don't take wages from you and we are definitely don't work under the doctors, we work collaboratively or hand in hand with the doctors. A hospital cannot survive without nurses, who would open a hospital with only doctors? never heard before.. What i'm trying to say here is, please, respect us, don't ever look down on nurses. We study 3 years not to become a maid, we are well equipped to save lives. Hi5 to all the nurses! You're doing an amazing job! Proud to be a nurse!

Babies

2011-09-21T08:31:00.000+08:00

Babies or we called it as neonate in medical terms for newborn.

I'm working night shift for these few days, yesterday was my first night duty. There 'was' a neonate just came into our world for less than 48 hours, suffered from congenital illness. He fought hard enough until GOD taken him away at 0010H today. His mother is a high risk pregnancy mother (age factor), father is aging as well with an eldest son with the age of 27 years old. Whom shall we blame for this matter? I heard it was an unwanted pregnancy or we known as 'accident'. I am very disappointed with the parents for what they have done, couldn't they use protection if they know it is not suitable for them to have baby in their age now? common, you both already have 8 children, youngest 13 years old. Isn't this enough? grow up man! you've indirectly killed your own son now. How many innocent lives have to be sacrifice for the mistakes of the adults? I am really getting sick of all these. Is the world going nuts? Again, GOD! What is going on here? Is Armageddon near? Sigh...

Will kor kor will always love you T_T

2011-09-19T21:44:00.000+08:00

What can you tell me from this picture? This picture reminds me of a kid in ICU now. He is a 5 years old kiddo, who suffered from malignant ependymoma. Tumor in the head. Went into surgery for few times, now the consultant has given up on the recurrent tumor. If he goes into the theater again, he might not making it out from there. Everyday, people who came to visit him, regardless of doctors, nurses, family members, will always asked him to smile. His parents sometimes get really frustrated and stressed up, accidentally scolded him if he does not breath well. Imagine how strong he is, to a 5 years old kid. Others in his age now is going to school, meeting new friends, running here and there, playing their favorite games, eating their favorite food. He is lying on the bed, breathing through the ventilator, feeding through nasal tubes, cannot run, can't even hug his parents and feel the warmness from his parents chest. Skin to skin touch is so limited. We're blaming him for watching TVs all the time, don't want to rest. Have we ever step on his shoe to think? He might be thinking that he would not live long, he may bid farewell to us anytime soon. He just want to catch up all the things he missed on the TV, trying to live a life where all other 5 years old kid been doing. He wanted to eat, to taste the food, but he can't even swallow, no coughing and gag reflex. He is scared that he might not wake up once he is asleep. He wanted to spent more time with his love ones. Who knows what future holds for him now? How long can he live? When will he go into complete comatose? We're harsh to him, forcing him to do this and that. Sometimes when he cries, my heart melted and i wanted to cry along. He is stronger than any one of us, in terms of mentality, physical, emotions. Sometimes i asked GOD, why have to be so cruel to a small kid like him? What have he done to deserve this? He is just 5 years old? His journey had just begun and YOU wanted to put an end to it? Why? I am telling lies to a 5 years old kid every time i see him. 'You are doing great, you will be okay, when you get recovered, will bring you to eat this and that, to visit here and there'. We all know he will leave one day. Why do nurses have to face all this? Everyday seeing people crying after their love ones has passed away, we're just standing at the side to see them. Wanted to give them a hug but we're worried what we might get too attached to them. Why have to be so cruel to us? Come back to the 5 years old kiddo, sometimes, the maid said he will call for me. He called me 'will kor kor', play with me. I wanted to play with him and make him smile but sometimes, i walked away...i am just too sad to see him like that....i will not drop a single drop of tears in front of him...i told myself...God, what is going on here?

I'm back ! ^_^

2011-09-19T21:24:00.000+08:00

Hi everybody, thanks for visiting my blog. Hehe. These few days is really tiring for me. Left leg on the road of recovery, told myself i must be tough. The consequences to be obstinate, painful and soreness of my physical body. People sees me, the only thing came out from their mouth was 'Will, you gain weight again'?...Yes, i am indeed a round fat santa claus now. Wanna get back to the slim version of me but it is so hard. A lot of things i wanted to get it done right but it always turn out to be...sigh..hard to comprehend...It's complicated...wanna get some shots of patron to overcome all this, LFT gone hay wire, have to stop consuming alcohol for some time...Not complaining about my life sucks etc, just wanna get things right...who am i compared to others who suffered from tremendous downhill in their life? Guide me Lord...

Baoz from Klang

2011-09-19T15:49:00.000+08:00

Got to know about this 'bao' shop from my aunt. Went to ppl's blog, found the address, called in to 'pre-book' the 'bao', follow my lil GPS. Phew..reached there...Bought 30 'baos' for my family..the one of my favorite is the curry 'bao'..yummy! recommended to go there

Address:
Klang Food Centre
10, Jln Batai Laut 5,
Tmn Intan, Klang,
Selangor, Malaysia
Phone: 603-3342 8122

No matter how, do not give up, move forward!

2011-09-18T23:19:00.001+08:00

A very nice drama..meaningful..real life story bout love, families, friends..faith..loyalty...betrayal...forgive...I'm personally touched by this drama...thumbs up!! SUKOI NEH!

Kiss the Rain

2011-09-17T23:29:00.000+08:00

KISS THE RAIN LYRICS YIRUMA 
RS 1
I often close my eyes
And I can see you smile
You reach out for my hand
And I'm woken from my dream
Although your heart is mine
It's hollow inside
I never had your love
And I never will

CHORUS
And every night
I lie awake
Thinking maybe you love me
Like I've always loved you
But how can you love me
Like I loved you when
You can't even look me straight in my eyes

VRS 2/3
I've never felt this way
To be so in love
To have someone there
Yet feel so alone
Aren't you supposed to be
The one to wipe my tears
The on to say that you would never leave

The waters calm and still
My reflection is there
I see you holding me
But then you disappear
All that is left of you
Is a memory
On that only, exists in my dreams

CHORUS

VRS 4
I don't know what hurts you
But I can feel it too
And it just hurts so much
To know that I can't do a thing
And deep down in my heart
Somehow I just know
That no matter what
I'll always love you

VRS 1

So why am I still here in the rain

LyricsBay | KISS THE RAIN LYRICS YIRUMA

2011-09-16T23:33:00.000+08:00

Really long time didn't update my blog already. Kind of miss the feelings of writing everything down. Lol. Time passed very fast, now i am already 26 years old. Kind of miss those days, i mean kiddo days. Live life without thinking of many things. Can time really turn backwards? Just for one time? Let me go back to those happy moments and dwell in it. When you grow older, your shoulder grow broader and heavier. I really wish to relax and stop in the time for a while. Tired..tired..

2011-09-16T23:30:00.000+08:00

Kinda love this song tho...>.<

a poem from my good bro but he does not write it..huhu =P

2009-07-25T00:51:00.001+08:00

How interesting life has been... To see and know the interesting characters that come your way.
To bask in their love and friendship in good times;
and to be forsaken in other times...

Do people give Love and Friendship when certain 'conditions' fulfill? And take it away when it is not...
Is Love itself conditional?
Or is there no more selfless Giving?

Here is a poem on Giving.... from the book of poems, "The Prophet"

Sean

"Then said a rich man, 'Speak to us of Giving.'

And he answered:

You give but little when you give of your possessions.

It is when you give of yourself that you truly give.

For what are your possessions but things you keep and guard for fear you may need them tomorrow?

And tomorrow, what shall tomorrow bring to the overprudent dog burying bones in the trackless sand as he follows the pilgrims to the holy city?

And what is fear of need but need itself?

Is not dread of thirst when your well is full, thirst that is unquenchable?

There are those who give little of the much which they have - and they give it for recognition and their hidden desire makes their gifts unwholesome.

And there are those who have little and give it all.

These are the believers in life and the bounty of life, and their coffer is never empty.

There are those who give with joy, and that joy is their reward.

And there are those who give with pain, and that pain is their baptism.

And there are those who give and know not pain in giving, nor do they seek joy, nor give with mindfulness of virtue;

They give as in yonder valley the myrtle breathes its fragrance into space.

Though the hands of such as these God speaks, and from behind their eyes He smiles upon the earth.

It is well to give when asked, but it is better to give unasked, through understanding;

And to the open-handed the search for one who shall receive is joy greater than giving

And is there aught you would withhold?

All you have shall some day be given;

Therefore give now, that the season of giving may be yours and not your inheritors'.

You often say, 'I would give, but only to the deserving.'

The trees in your orchard say not so, nor the flocks in your pasture.

They give that they may live, for to withhold is to perish.

Surely he who is worthy to receive his days and his nights is worthy of all else from you.

And he who has deserved to drink from the ocean of life deserves to fill his cup from your little stream.

And what desert greater shall there be than that which lies in the courage and the confidence, nay the charity, of receiving?

And who are you that men should rend their bosom and unveil their pride, that you may see their worth naked and their pride unabashed?

See first that you yourself deserve to be a giver, and an instrument of giving.

For in truth it is life that gives unto life - while you, who deem yourself a giver, are but a witness.

And you receivers - and you are all receivers - assume no weight of gratitude, lest you lay a yoke upon yourself and upon him who gives.

Rather rise together with the giver on his gifts as on wings;

For to be overmindful of your debt, is to doubt his generosity who has the free-hearted earth for mother, and God for father. "

Kahlil Gibran - Lebanese poet (1883 - 1931)

Just BE..... (from a good bro of mine)

2009-07-25T00:49:00.000+08:00

Be strong enough to face the world each day.

Be weak enough to know you cannot do everything alone.

Be generous to those who need your help.

Be frugal with what you need yourself.

Be wise enough to know that you do not know everything.

Be foolish enough to believe in miracles.

Be willing to share your joys.

Be willing to share the sorrows of others.

Be a leader when you see a path others have missed.

Be a follower when you are shrouded in the midst of uncertainty.

Be the first to congratulate an opponent who succeeds.

Be the last to criticize a colleague who fails.

Be sure where your next step will fall, so that you will not stumble.

Be sure of your final destination, in case you are going the wrong way.

Be loving to those who love you.

Be loving to those who do not love you, and they may change.

here i am again!

2009-07-25T00:36:00.000+08:00

it's been ages (<-----familiar oni) since my last post. what to do? lazy arse! haha..just feel like typing something, cant sleep..long and lonely night, staring at my computer..surfing unknown urls, lost...mind filled with tons of crappy stuff..soul was wondering around to search for a peaceful and quiet place, a sanctuary! where is my sanctuary i asked, no one could answer my question i guess. only god knows..in the church? heaven? hell? clubs? my house? hospital? i cant find it..maybe i need some personal space to cool down and relax..i'm like a time bomb, waiting to blast off. alcohol is my best friend now, sooner or later, cigarette will be my best friend too! people says i'm obstinate, cant follow the flow of life but hey, i like to be myself and what the hell is wrong with that..no one is perfect and who gave u the privilege to judge others since you yourself are not perfect? humans, humans.....i wanna be free, totally free......

A very meaningful song in japs..english translation as below

2009-03-23T05:10:00.001+08:00

Moriyama Naotaro - Cherry Blossoms (Solo)

Lyrics: Moriyama Naotaro, Okachimachi Kaito
Music: Moriyama Naotaro

I’m sure that we’re waiting for the days when we can see you again
We’ll wave and shout on a road lined with cherry blossom trees
No matter how hard it got you always smiled
So even when doubt crept in I felt like I could do my best

Within the fading scene I can hear that day’s song

Cherry blossoms, cherry blossoms, they bloom now
Knowing their destiny is to fall
Farewell my friend, it’s time to leave
Those feelings that never change…
I feel them now…

Maybe I could say words without lies now
You shine as I pray for your future, these are words of truth

The city moves as if to hurry us on

Cherry blossoms, cherry blossoms, they just drift in the air
I believe in a moment of rebirth someday
Don’t cry my friend, it’s time for our painful goodbye
Put on that genuine smile…
Go ahead…

Cherry blossoms, cherry blossoms, now ride the wind
Bask in the light that cries out forever
Farewell my friend, let’s meet here again

On a road lined with cherry blossom trees

who can tell me whtz going on here? a bear........

2009-03-12T22:38:00.000+08:00

one of the songs that motivates me alot

2009-03-12T22:33:00.000+08:00

Welcome to the planet
Welcome to existence
Everyone's here
Everyone's here
Everybody's watching you now
Everybody waits for you now
What happens next?
What happens next?

I dare you to move
I dare you to move
I dare you to lift yourself up off the floor
I dare you to move
I dare you to move
Like today never happened
Today never happened before

Welcome to the fallout
Welcome to resistance
The tension is here
The tension is here
Between who you are and who you could be
Between how it is and how it should be

I dare you to move
I dare you to move
I dare you to lift yourself up off the floor
I dare you to move
I dare you to move
Like today never happened
Today never happened

Maybe redemption has stories to tell
Maybe forgiveness is right where you fell
Where can you run to escape from yourself?
Where you gonna go?
Where you gonna go?
Salvation is here

I dare you to move
I dare you to move
I dare you to lift yourself up off the floor
I dare you to move
I dare you to move
Like today never happened
Today never happened
Today never happened
Today never happened before

Nurses Vs DRs

2009-03-10T16:30:00.000+08:00

hmm, where shall i start? why don't i start with the incidents happened in HDU today, to me in fact. today got scolded by two so-called specialist Dr. Without any reasons or rationale, they scolded me and gave me upside down, left and right nicely.So does my senior, pity on her. 1st day working after 1 week leave then kena head shot! Why those doctors never use their rational side to think, if the nurses arent in the hospital to take care of the patient, will they survived? What is their duty and responsibilities to the patient? Have they ever asked how's the patient feels? Have they ever tried to do a sponging to the pt? clean the feces? throw the urine? experience multiple tasks at one time when thing seems to be impossible to be done? but yes we nurses did it! i can tell tht Drs are not more superior or made them higher in human society, we nurses collaborate with doctors in taking care of the patients. Not as a servants that they could 'bark' at! Hospital without nurses can't be function at all but a place without doctors still can function, etc: the nursing home! have you ever seen a clinic or hospital without nurses, do let me know. Nurses are human too, we do have feelings and dignity, so do u doctors! If you want us to respect you, 1st, please earn your respects. Why would people call nurses as angels but not Drs? I've been wondering this question for so long. Nurses is a noble job, we have to go through 3 years course and have to fill ourselves with lotsa TLC. In private settings, patients tend to talk more to the doctors because they think that Drs are the only one can save their lives but they have forgotten the role of nurses.Sigh! Who is the one who offer them warm blanket when they are cold? who accompany them when they are alone in the dark? who is the one who take care of their activities of daily living? who clean their perianal area? who arrange everything accordingly so that their stay in the hospital won't be a nightmare to them? etc....if i were to count all the things nurses did, i think i can write a novel about nurses. Why can't the Drs be more polite in talking? manners make a man? have they ever learned this? have they learn about professionalism? scolding nurses in front of the patients or other colleagues makes them more powerful and unthreatable? All sounds bullshit to me, everything they did now are juz merely some practical jokes. Losing nurses in the hospital is like losing their extremities. You cant walk, i can use your hands to do miracle works. I hope Drs can sit down and calm themselves and think, are they treating the pt's diseases with all of their heart or just want to treat the disease itself and get the pay? i'm so confused with the doctors in malaysia nowadays, compare to western countries where human rights are stressed, malaysia doctors are lacking 20years behind! In terms of attitude and medical advances. What i can do now is to pray to God, hopefully they will change in one day and be more 'gentle'. A little bit of care means alot to the patients and ppl around them.

Love

2009-03-06T00:44:00.000+08:00

“Love is always patient and kind; it is never jealous, love is never boastful or conceited; it is never rude or selfish; it does not take offense, and is not resentful. Love takes no pleasure in other people’s sins but delights in the truth; it is always ready to excuse, to trust, to hope, and to endure whatever comes."

New post?

2009-03-06T00:32:00.000+08:00

whoa, itz been ages since my last post....man, i must be damn lazy...yeah, it true some of the time...life nowadays seems to be a lil hectic to me..especially after joining ICU in sunway..everyday kena 'shoot' upside down, left and right..have to brush up on my knowledge and skills as i'm taking care those ppl who needs critical care..i was totally naive, i thought it shud be easy for me to cope with all these hurdles but 1 thing came through my mind after 1 month working in icu..why did i choose nursing at the first place?i was totally stress to the max but still, i have to do my best coz i know nothing in this world is 'user-friendly' and god loves to give us challenges..i have to agree with that, we grow and learn from challenges..no doubt ppl tend to do mistake but hey, at least we learn right..haihz....wht the hell is life?work, sleep, work sleep, rest day still thinking of work....during work has no time to think about rest or eat...itz like rush hours...v do we have to chase the time instead of time waiting for us?sigh! dang...i wish i could climb up to a higher ground to shout!

long long time

2008-07-27T22:58:00.001+08:00

hey guys, am back here...phew..finally..i've finished my sem 8 and currently having my clinical placement..will be going to the state of johore for my psychiatric posting next week for 2 weeks time..kinda excited and kinda sad..coz ma lil bro juz came back from sabah for his clinical placement but i gotta go far...gotta wait 2 weeks more to meet him..itz like been ages even though it's juz 3 months time...maybe we're juz too close to each other..haha..hmm...to be honest, i'm kinda nervous now for my LJM examination this december...dunno y?even though i can score great results in the college but it doesnt mean i can do well in LJM..i must do my best! sigh...juz tht i do not have the confident to do so...will be going for my cousin's wedding dinner in november and the other in december...kinda excited tho..haha....gotta keep fit to buy nice clothing..muahahaha..<-----mission impossible...sigh!!!!!!!argh....lazy to type la..gotta now..ciaoz..

my birthday pics

2008-06-14T04:28:00.000+08:00

i'm back!

2008-06-14T04:17:00.000+08:00

whoa, can't believe my damn fucking schedule for semester 8!all night class and hell lots of assignment and research thingy to do..especially the nursing research thing and management subject.killing me slowly and softly.i'm real bad in these two subjects. the reason why? coz i hate restrictions and rules..crap crap..can't sleep today coz i'll be having class on saturday from 7.30am till 4pm..WTF! damn college! suppose a day fro me to rest? just finish watching another TVB drama, 最美丽的第7天..so damn nice and touching..haha..these few days wasn't feeling well, having tremors more frequent and fatigue all the time..guess my blood pressure shoot up again..i seriously don't know what to do with this stupid body anymore..have to pretend so much in front of people just to get rid of their attention and try not to let them worry.everyday sleep less than 3 hours, how to survive?to a normal healthy person, that might be just a piece of cake.to me, it's a one way ticket to hell..so many things to do, so many notes to read to memorize. another 5 more months to LJM examination..i'm so dead man..everyone around me keep saying that i'm brilliant, i can do this and that..in my heart, i just want to yell out to them and tell them that 'i'm not GOD!, i'm not perfect'.i'm just trying to do the best i could. arrrrrrrr........i want to have some shut eye now..feeling heavy now..ciao..

hmm....23 years of glory? Lolz..

2008-06-02T00:26:00.000+08:00

itz half past 12am now, i'm officially 23 years old...dang!old dy..haha...from morning till night was celebrating with frens and family..quite tired but damn enjoying and damn happy..dunno y..maybe becoz juz finish my exam i think..haha..receive alot of presents..really apreciate it but paiseh leh..let u guys waste money oni..i will bcome a good person, dun woli..hehe..ah...really exhausted dy..wanna 'oi oi' dy..goodnite all..take care..muahs..luv u guys

OSCE tomorrow!!!!

2008-05-20T00:29:00.000+08:00

whoa, i can't believe time passed so fast. tomorrow will be my OSCE (Objective-Skilled-Clinical-Examination) for semester 7. Kind of nervous now even though the procedures i've done many times. These 2 weeks is killing me softly, reading books, notes, dictionaries, 'choo-choo train' in the midnight. Argh....i want a long long holiday! next month i'll be in my semester 8. 1 more semester to go till graduation day. hmm, should i say, LJM (Lembaga Jururawat Malaysia) examination! <--it is actually a very tough exam, all the answer given in the question are true, you gotta choose the most precise and rationale one. critical thinking again. Who says nursing is just a piece of cake? you come and try it yourself! Argh...these few days keep playing Dota, just feel like killing someone in the game to release tension. damn tense up! i just feel weird now and then, maybe i didn't do well in test 1 and 2 i guess. my last gpa was 4.00, i have to get at least 3.95 and above for this sem or my cgpa will drop again! **bark!!!!! lol...No need to worry coz underdog is here!!!!! crap..getting nuts now...well, gotta resume my studies, gonna 'choo-choo train' again! wish me luck!

tension tension tension!!!!

2008-05-18T23:55:00.000+08:00

damn it! i just heard some of my mates said the lecturer actually gave tips for the exam to the students, as the order from the higher authority from the college in order to bring up those with low CGPA. bullshit to the max i said. we work so hard all these while and study till like hell but what do we deserve? they can graduate with us with the same results and compete for job with us. Losers i said! in order to maintain the so-called 'good image' of the college, they would rather do anything. i hope those with the 'good result' out of a sudden without a 'good' reason will score 'flying colours' in LJM! I sincerely curse u guys to fail the exam! this is cheating and u guys are playing with patients' lives you bastards, assholes or whatever. So sad to hear about this, if u have worked hard enough, i don't think u can't pass the exam. just that u guys are bunch of lazy bumps! Asshole! spoil my mood today! u think u can do better than us after u got the tips, well, think again. i won't let ur nose get higher anymore for u guys have been acting like shit lately with the fake result. but still, can't beat me! so fuck off losers! ahhhhhh..enough is enough, lazy to talk about them. Crap! gotta work harder and show them the result from diligent, honest, and strong determination. We now declare war to those 'fakers'. We will prove it in the exam later. I just don't like it, especially in our profession. We are dealing with life and death, it is not funny at all.i dunno how u guys manage to enroll urself in this medical line without tender, loving, care and the most important thing ----> responsibility! Whatever u did, God knows and u'll reap for what u have sown! This is what i always believe and that is why i don't take action against u guys and the lecturer. I don't deserve to judge u guys. Honestly, i have to thank u guys instead of hating. because of your naiveness, it shoot up my adrenaline to study even harder. i will change the education system in the future and i will make sure masterskill college of nursing and health does not produce 'quantity' anymore! i'm so ashame of myself for being part of the college, so ashame of myself to tell my friends and family i'm taking nursing in masterskill college of nursing & health. It is a damn humiliation to me, to my dignity! i just want to graduate from this hell place asap and will never come back. Never i said! too many vermins in the college, shadows all around.

Prayer and a moment of silent to the victims in china earthquake

2008-05-14T02:55:00.000+08:00

Dear Lord,

I can't hold my tears as i was reading the news about the earthquake happened in china, many souls sacrifice, be it men, women, children. I know everything happened happens for a reason and Lord you have your own ways. Lord i pray that you would save those victims and bless all the victims of the disaster. Lord please guide those lost soul and bring them to your kingdom, let them rest in peace. To those still struggling for their lives, Lord i pray that you will grant them strength and faith and the will to survive. Bless the rescuers a healthy and strong body to do their job, bless their family as well. Lord for there is nothing impossible to you, pour down your holy spirit and touched their soul, do your miracle on them O Lord. Please help them O Lord. Please show your mercy to them O Lord.

My Jesus, my Saviour
Lord there is none like You
All of my days I want to praise
The wonders of Your mighty love

My comfort, my shelter
Tower of refuge and strength
Let every breath, all that I am
Never cease to worship You

Shout to the Lord
All the Earth, let us sing
Power and majesty
Praise to the King
Mountains bow down
And the seas will roar
At the sound of Your name

I sing for joy at the work
Of Your hand
Forever I'll love You
Forever I'll stand
Nothing compares
To the promise I have
In You

In Jesus wonderful name i ask and pray
Amen

*i urge all of you to pray with me, for the victims and the rescuers. u can choose to fast and pray or praying in a group. That's the least thing we can do to help them. thank you and may lord bless you. God bless.

can't sleep

2008-05-14T02:35:00.000+08:00

sigh, trying to push myself for a shut eye but my restless soul just wouldn't get some rest. Mind is filled with tons of responsibilities and notes. Exam coming soon, next week. suppose to be satisfied if i have worked hard and did my best but i just couldn't hold back my 'perfectionist' character. Friends around always advise me not to demand and aim too high, i guess i couldn't help myself. i just like to aim high but when i fall, i don't feel 'too sad' either. Is it really hard to score 4 flat every semester? hmm, i guess so. damn it! i do feel tired these few days, was guiding juniors in their studies as well as doing my own revision. as time passed, i'm getting more frantic and worried. going to graduate this december and will be working as a nurse. thinking about sunway medical centre really freak me to my bones. wanna ask me the reason why? i couldn't tell ya because i myself don't know why.ah crap! can someone upgrade my memory capacity so that i could stuff more knowledge inside? just feel that my brain now is not enough for me even though people around keep calling me 'the walking and talking dictionary'. having good results in this college is not a good thing, it is a disaster. people tend to be jealous and try to bring you down. i really don't know why, whatever incident or shit related to me, if it happens today, the whole college will know about it immediately. i'm so sick of it, i wish i could have some privacy and some rest periods. please spare me fellow human, show me your humanitarian side rather than being cruel to me. damn fucked up life! wish could end this fucking college study asap. duh! SO FREAKING TIRED AND BORED WITH MY NOTES!!!!!! HELL!!!phew, feel better now..just like to crap and fool around, i will ganbateh!!!! wish me luck! adios amigo!

1 liter of tears

2008-05-09T11:11:00.000+08:00

something really touched my heart and soul..

2008-05-09T10:49:00.000+08:00

lol...seems like i can't control my brain and my hand, just had a strong feel that i should write something here. Regarding to the drama '1 liter of tears', i rated it as the best real life drama ever. I got the movie from my lil bro couple of weeks ago but i didn't open it. Bro said it was damn touching and was able drew his 'masculine tears' out. He is damn true. i did shed tears, in each episodes indeed. (i think more than a gallon of water. lol). i salute to beloved 'Aya', for her courage, strength, neverending faith and the will to survive. She was right, disease isn't a disaster, it is just some inconveniences. She motivates me to become an outstanding nurse and of course, a neurosurgeon in the future.(to be a neurosurgeon was and is my dream since young but...sigh..i shall NEVER GIVE UP!!!!! Gambateh!).Sometimes, i do wish to have an elder siblings so that i could at least sulk in front of them, getting love and guidance from them. Being the eldest in the family is not easy, seriously. even though it's not easy, i will definitely walk with faith and courage. nothing is impossible in this world, at least not to Jesus Christ, our saviour. Now i've learned to accept the disease i have and be compliance to the medication. I must survive! Aya told her boyfriend in the hospital that he (the boyfriend) must survive, must survive! she can't speak (aphasia) and write due to her disease, the only thing she could communicate with people was to point out word by word. how fascinating. sigh, i hereby urge all those who haven't watch this drama to get a copy of it and dwell in the drama, u can learn alot. Oops, gotta continue revision. Arigato.

一公升的眼泪 (1 litre of tears)

2008-05-08T23:46:00.000+08:00

1 Litre no Namida (1リットルの涙 1 Rittoru no Namida, lit. "1 Litre of Tears"; also called A Diary with Tears or A Diary of Tears) is a dramatic tragedy diary written by Aya Kitō (木藤亜也 Kitō Aya, July 19, 1962 - May 23, 1988) published after her death. The diary, a true story based on her own life, was originally written in first person. It is about a girl coping with her teenage life along with a degenerative disease. She keeps a diary of not only what she does but how she feels and the hardships she must endure.

Aya Kito was diagnosed with a disease called Spinocerebellar ataxia when she was 15 years old. The disease causes the person to lose control over their body, but because the person can retain all mental ability the disease acts as a prison. Aya discovers this disastrous news as the disease has already developed. There is no cure.

Through family, medical examinations and rehabilitations, and finally succumbing to the disease, Aya must cope with the disease and live on with life until her death at the age of 25.

sigh..

2008-05-07T10:42:00.001+08:00

kinda busy with final exam now, do not have much time to online. sigh, will resume writing after exam. that would be in june. to all my friends out there, gambateh yo! u can do it! god bless. muahsss..

CPR

2008-04-28T19:08:00.000+08:00

Cardiopulmonary resuscitation (CPR) is a lifesaving technique useful in many emergencies, including heart attack or near drowning, in which someone's breathing or heartbeat has stopped. CPR involves a combination of chest compression and mouth-to-mouth rescue breathing that keeps oxygenated blood flowing to the brain and other vital organs until more definitive medical treatment can restore a normal heart rhythm.

When the heart stops, the absence of oxygenated blood can cause irreparable brain damage in only a few minutes. Death will occur within eight to 10 minutes. Time is critical when you're helping an unconscious person who isn't breathing.

To learn CPR properly, take an accredited first-aid training course, including CPR and how to use an automatic external defibrillator (AED).

Before you begin
Assess the situation before starting CPR:

Is the person conscious or unconscious?
If the person appears unconscious, tap or shake his or her shoulder and ask loudly, "Are you OK?"
If the person doesn't respond and two people are available, one should call 911 or the local emergency number and one should begin CPR. If you are alone and have immediate access to a telephone, call 911 before beginning CPR — unless you think the person has become unresponsive because of suffocation (such as from drowning). In this special case, begin CPR for one minute and then call 911.
If an AED is immediately available, deliver one shock if advised by the device, then begin CPR.

Remember the ABCs
Think ABC — Airway, Breathing and Circulation — to remember the steps explained below. Move quickly through Airway and Breathing to begin chest compressions.

AIRWAY: Clear the airway

Put the person on his or her back on a firm surface.
Kneel next to the person's neck and shoulders.
Open the person's airway using the head-tilt, chin-lift maneuver. Put your palm on the person's forehead and gently tilt the head back. Then with the other hand, gently lift the chin forward to open the airway.
Check for normal breathing, taking no more than five or 10 seconds: Look for chest motion, listen for breath sounds, and feel for the person's breath on your cheek and ear. Gasping is not considered to be normal breathing. If the person isn't breathing normally and you are trained in CPR, begin mouth-to-mouth breathing. If you believe the person is unconscious from a heart attack and you haven't been trained in emergency procedures, skip mouth-to-mouth rescue breathing and proceed directly to chest compression.

BREATHING: Breathe for the person
Rescue breathing can be mouth-to-mouth breathing or mouth-to-nose breathing if the mouth is seriously injured or can't be opened.

With the airway open (using the head-tilt, chin-lift maneuver) pinch the nostrils shut for mouth-to-mouth breathing and cover the person's mouth with yours, making a seal.
Prepare to give two rescue breaths. Give the first rescue breath — lasting one second — and watch to see if the chest rises. If it does rise, give the second breath. If the chest doesn't rise, repeat the head-tilt, chin-lift maneuver and then give the second breath.
Begin chest compressions to restore circulation.

CIRCULATION: Restore blood circulation with chest compressions

Place the heel of one hand over the center of the person's chest, between the nipples. Place your other hand on top of the first hand. Keep your elbows straight and position your shoulders directly above your hands.
Use your upper body weight (not just your arms) as you push straight down on (compress) the chest 2 inches (approximately 5 centimeters). Push hard and push fast — give two compressions per second, or about 120 compressions per minute.
After 30 compressions, tilt the head back and lift the chin up to open the airway. Prepare to give two rescue breaths. Pinch the nose shut and breathe into the mouth for one second. If the chest rises, give a second rescue breath. If the chest doesn't rise, repeat the head-tilt, chin-lift maneuver and then give the second rescue breath. That's one cycle. If someone else is available, ask that person to give two breaths after you do 30 compressions.
If the person has not begun moving after five cycles (about two minutes) and an automatic external defibrillator (AED) is available, apply it and follow the prompts. The American Heart Association recommends administering one shock, then resuming CPR — starting with chest compressions — for two more minutes before administering a second shock. If you're not trained to use an AED, a 911 operator may be able to guide you in its use. Trained staff at many public places are also able to provide and use an AED. Use pediatric pads, if available, for children ages 1 to 8. Do not use an AED for infants younger than age 1. If an AED isn't available, go to No. 5 below.
Continue CPR until there are signs of movement or until emergency medical personnel take over.

To perform CPR on a child:

The procedure for giving CPR to a child age 1 through 8 is essentially the same as that for an adult. The differences are as follows:

If you're alone, perform five cycles of compressions and breaths on the child — this should take about two minutes — before calling 911 or your local emergency number or using an AED.
Use only one hand to perform heart compressions.
Breathe more gently.
Use the same compression-breath rate as is used for adults: 30 compressions followed by two breaths. This is one cycle. Following the two breaths, immediately begin the next cycle of compressions and breaths.
After five cycles (about two minutes) of CPR, if there is no response and an AED is available, apply it and follow the prompts. Use pediatric pads if available. If pediatric pads aren't available, use adult pads.

Continue until the child moves or help arrives.

To perform CPR on a baby:

Most cardiac arrests in infants occur from lack of oxygen, such as from drowning or choking. If you know the infant has an airway obstruction, perform first aid for choking. If you don't know why the infant isn't breathing, perform CPR.

To begin, assess the situation. Stroke the baby and watch for a response, such as movement, but don't shake the child.

If there's no response, follow the ABC procedures below and time the call for help as follows:

If you're the only rescuer and CPR is needed, do CPR for two minutes — about five cycles — before calling 911 or your local emergency number.
If another person is available, have that person call for help immediately while you attend to the baby.

AIRWAY: Clear the airway

Place the baby on his or her back on a firm, flat surface, such as a table. The floor or ground also will do.
Gently tip the head back by lifting the chin with one hand and pushing down on the forehead with the other hand.
In no more than 10 seconds, put your ear near the baby's mouth and check for breathing: Look for chest motion, listen for breath sounds, and feel for breath on your cheek and ear.

If the infant isn't breathing, begin mouth-to-mouth breathing immediately.

BREATHING: Breathe for the infant

Cover the baby's mouth and nose with your mouth.
Prepare to give two rescue breaths. Use the strength of your cheeks to deliver gentle puffs of air (instead of deep breaths from your lungs) to slowly breathe into the baby's mouth one time, taking one second for the breath. Watch to see if the baby's chest rises. If it does, give a second rescue breath. If the chest does not rise, repeat the head-tilt, chin-lift maneuver and then give the second breath.
If the chest still doesn't rise, examine the mouth to make sure no foreign material is inside. If the object is seen, sweep it out with your finger. If the airway seems blocked, perform first aid for a choking infant.
Begin chest compressions to restore circulation.

CIRCULATION: Restore blood circulation

Imagine a horizontal line drawn between the baby's nipples. Place two fingers of one hand just below this line, in the center of the chest.
Gently compress the chest to about one-third to one-half the depth of the chest.
Count aloud as you pump in a fairly rapid rhythm. You should pump at a rate of about 100 to 120 pumps a minute.
Give two breaths after every 30 chest compressions.
Perform CPR for about two minutes before calling for help unless someone else can make the call while you attend to the baby.
Continue CPR until you see signs of life or until a professional relieves you.

my all time favourite game since 1995

2008-04-28T18:23:00.000+08:00

Mother's day

2008-04-22T19:18:00.000+08:00

Mother's Day

There were some different beginnings
To what we know as, Mother's Day
One woman, Anna Reeves Jarvis
Mothers' Work Day Clubs, her way.

They focused on sanitary conditions
And provided medicines for the poor
They promised to care for all Soldiers
From both sides in the Civil War.

After that War that had divided
The new-found peace would take her
To healing families and friends
And she became a real peacemaker.

Then, in the Eighteen seventies
Something we could sure use now
Mothers' Peace Day, was started
By, Julia Ward Howe.

A famous woman of the time
Reformer, lecturer, and writer of note
The Battle Hymn Of The Republic
Is something that she wrote.

A woman' suffrage association
Voted her their first President
And hers, the first suggestion
To have a Mother's Day event.

Then there was Frank Hering
In the year Nineteen ought-four
Of the Fraternal Order Of Eagles
Who claimed to open the door.

In Nineteen fourteen Woodrow Wilson
Recommending a Federal Mother's Day
Signed a joint resolution
That we now observe each year in May.

No matter who takes the credit
It was a long time overdue
To honor all those Ladies
Who gave life to me and you.

So, those who still have theirs
Should remember those times passed
And thank Her now for all those things
She's done for you in the past.

For those whose Mom is gone
It's a time to reflect and say,
"Mom, I love and miss you,
On this, and every other day.

Our Mothers shape our being
And have an endless wealth to give
And She will be a part of us
For as long as we may live.

The person i admire the most...WS..

2008-04-22T19:10:00.000+08:00

"It is the east, and Juliet is the sun" Romeo and Juliet ( Quote Act II, Scene II).

"Good Night, Good night! Parting is such sweet sorrow, that I shall say good night till it be morrow."
Romeo and Juliet ( Quote Act II, Scene II).

"What's in a name? That which we call a rose by any other name would smell as sweet". Romeo and Juliet ( Quote Act II, Sc. II).

"Wisely and slow; they stumble that run fast". ( Quote Act II, Scene III).

"Tempt not a desperate man" Romeo and Juliet Quote (Act V, Sc. III).

"For you and I are past our dancing days" . Romeo and Juliet ( Quote Act I, Scene V).

"O! she doth teach the torches to burn bright" Romeo and Juliet Quote (Act I, Sc. V).

"It seems she hangs upon the cheek of night like a rich jewel in an Ethiope's ear" . ( Quote Act I, Scene V).

memories? 记忆。。。。 ingatan?

2008-04-21T00:44:00.000+08:00

why do we have memories? i really dun understand..sweet memories can lighten up our days when we're damn bored..what about the bitter ones? sometimes, i do hope that i do not have any memories at all so that i could have surprises everyday.learning new stuff everyday..but that will lead me to no advancement, no improvement...how do we overcome the sad memories...hypnotize by the psychiatrist and delete the memory? what if the memories stays in the 'recycle bin' and restored by itself? i'm extremely blur now....4 years since her death and the memories about her keep haunting me, every single day...especially those 'meaningful' days...her birthday, the first day we met, we kiss, we get laid, we quarreled, we dated...adventures.....how i miss 'those' days....i want to get rid of all these..seriously...can someone guide me through this? God? semester 7 final exam is around the corner, i'm so anxious and tensed up to the max....i wanted to do the best of my best because i've messed up my test 1 and 2..not my fault tho, the 'india' style....what the fuck!!!!! do really hated her at the beginning..how could she expect us to write all the points since '5 marks' were shown beside the question? everyone thought it was 5 points or 10 points to deserve that 5 marks? oh crap..she wants everything...now i have a deep thought about this..she was right actually..she wants us to learn more and be outstanding..i should have thank her instead of being angry with her..she gave me motivation to learn more and be an outstanding nurse...i always wanted to...thank you miss XXX...i really appreciate it..LJM exam is on 22nd december 2008...really anxious because just feel like time is running out...1 day 24 hours is not enough for me..how i wish i could have all the time in the world....seriously...i urge my classmates and friends..please study hard and change the perception of the people towards nursing..we are not lousy and lazy..proof to the doctor that we are their colleagues, not servant..we have the same knowledge as them...without us, patient can't survive...as i always say,' everyone can be a nurse, whether you are a lousy nurse, average nurse, good nurse or an outstanding nurse, it's all in your hand...u decide for your future..patients' lives are in our hand...please don't play a fool with it...we are angels...not demons!'...gambateh yo will ku san!

Love....

2008-04-21T00:27:00.001+08:00

“Love is always patient and kind; it is never jealous, love is never boastful or conceited; it is never rude or selfish; it does not take offense, and is not resentful. Love takes no pleasure in other people’s sins but delights in the truth; it is always ready to excuse, to trust, to hope, and to endure whatever comes. Love does not come to an end.”